I miss you

No picture this time! :P Just..wouldn't suit the poem the poem..I guess..

Windows staring back,

I look into nothing

The wolf in my heart

On a full moon day,

In all its glory-

Howling.

Trying to reach out

To you.

To tell you.

To make you feel

Free

Safe

Warm.

To hold your hand,

Let you know

I'm here.

The wait...so long

For you to come back,

Come home.

Strongly, I hold

Onto it.

Onto you.

The memories.

Calming the wolf down,

I wait.

I will always wait.

Looking away,

Trying to proceed.

Hope!

Everything kept aside

At the back of my mind-

Alive,

Yet away.

Facing the sun,

Letting go...

I stare into thin air,

Finally exhale.

I look down,

As a tear breaks free,

Falling to the earth

As if looking at me,

Standing here,

Missing you.

Brave

Watching you walk away

I blink my eyes wide open,

trying to digest the reality.

I don't know why

I cant seem to let you go.

When the roof comes crashing in

and I'm left with the blame on my head.

My head spinning,

So wild,

I cant seem to make it stop.

Yesterday seems far off.

I try to look at the future

With a brighter view.

But somehow the past seems

to be catching up.

We decide to walk alone.

Should be easy I tell myself.

You've done it before...

But this time its different.

I don't want it.

The millionth time I wonder-

What is it that I do?

Every time?

Why cant I live a normal life?

But sit dealing with maniacs 

and mirrors and a self demeaning soul?

The thirst hasn't been quenched.

And I will always be looking.

Brave, never misled.

Don't forget me.

I won't forget you too.

No projects as of yet!

Hello! And I'm back! :)

Someone yesterday reminded me about a not-so-long-ago promise to undertake some projects about writing so that it was more consistent.
Well...as it turns out.. I don't think I'll be able to undertake any long term writing projects write now! Sorry :-( You see, I'd like to keep this blog to myself, for my poems. Also, I won't be as free as I'd like to be in the coming few weeks. And maybe soon I'll start a new blog for all the 30 day memes and random writings...etc. So, for the selected few, who have been telling me to do 30/60 days projects, I'll let you know if I put up another blog! :)

Thanks again..for reminding me! (Allison ;) and Noah you too!)

Hope to hear more from you guys! 

Keeping it quiet

An inspiration from a book I read.. :) and some of my favorite songs..

Freshly baked cookies

and the smell of chocolate

as you think of donuts

and muffins.

Suddenly the sun's all warm

smiling brightly at you

and your iPod's playing

that favorite tune..

You tap your feet

Feel the breeze blow your hair.

You feel energized and fresh

and can't wait to dance.

The evenings you feel

so colorful and alive,

Bustling with people

careless and free.

You feel all pretty

and you're more than happy

Suddenly all so helpful

and your eyes are shining bright.

You giggle, laugh

Feel all goody-goody

Crave for your favorite foods,

Yet so relaxed and at peace.

Then it strikes,

why out of the blue,

Is there such a change?

That your view of the same world

Is all the opposite of what you felt?

You, then, grin to yourself

and you feel your heart smiling...

and its reflecting on your face..

You know the reason deep down,

and you have never felt this way before. :)

Have You?

This is one poem I wrote last week..I found it quite true to its nature..and I hope you do too.

Have you ever felt the way I have?
When you take a deep breath
And put your fingers through his hair..
Search for those crazy eyes,
You lose yourself into.
You take a deep breath...
And remember..
When you felt complete,
At peace with yourself..and with him.
Someone you had waited for,
Since quite a long time.
And you'd felt safe..
Secure.. Protected.
When you put your arms around him
Or when he touched your cheek..
Or when he told you
He'd never do justice to someone like you...

Have you ever felt the way I have?
When, like a fool,
You accepted it,
Gave in everything you ever had.
Told him you liked him,
No matter what.
Tear trickles down your face.
You realise
You have been dreaming all along.
Such stuff never exist..
Or maybe you feel you don't deserve any of it.

Have you ever felt the way I have?
When you looked at your friends,
Wondered why was it
That they got everything they wished for?
And you can't even have that one wish
You put your heart and soul into?
Why was it,
That they always had their family
as well as their friends by their side?
Did I do something wrong?
Have I missed something?
The one day when you felt you won
That the very next, you lost everything?

Have you ever felt the way I have?
When you looked back,
You saw absolutely no one.
Even the ones who promised?
The ones that vowed to never break your trust..
And you have never ever felt
Such intense pain in that tiny little heart of yours?

Have you ever felt the way I have?
So...open..naked.
Like you have nothing left to say.
Everything taken away from you
And you're left all alone.
Maybe you never knew him at all.
But you did blurt out all your secrets,
Didn't you??

This had to happen, I say.
When was the last time,
God let anything nice happen to you?
That fragile piece of you,
Taken away, stolen.
And you're clueless what to do?

Tear trickles down your cheek
And you remembered the last time
You felt cared...
The feeling that nobody needs you now.

Have you ever felt the way I have?
Have you?

'ello Again! :-)

Sorry for not blogging in a while...had a lot going on, I guess. Oh and a very HAPPY NEW YEAR PEOPLE!!!!!! :-D I know it's sort of late now...because you're already in the routine...but hey so what? :) I still hope you have a gorgeous year ahead! :-)

So...I know I haven't written in a while and even though it's not all that great, I need to keep writing! And to enforce that, I am planning to start a project...probably a 100days challenge or a 90days challenge just so that I keep writing and with a deadline (obviously).

I think that this time I am going to try and expand my limits. Not try and narrow down to a topic or just poems or just stories but anything I feel like writing about. Like this short piece I had written (Cold November Evening I think..), have you read it? If not, please do! And I'm going to try and faithfully squeeze out time to write (and post) once I have this project on.

I need quite a lot of encouragement, since you already know how unbelievably LAZY I am... :)
And I'll soon have a post up about what exactly I plan to do. ;)
So hang in there, I'll be back in some days and then off we get to work!
:-D

A walk at the beach...

A friend of mine wrote this piece...it was so true, I decided to post it here! I liked it, hope you like it as well.

          I was walking, I don't know for how long maybe 3 or 4 hours. I had set out from home in an old khaki pants, a brown top and a black cardigan, wearing flip flops. My long hair were tied in a mess. I didn't know where I was headed. My legs were sore with pain and so was my heart. Maybe it was right not to expect things to happen but still I was obsessed. With the help of moonlight, I walked on. Now I had made up my mind it was the beach that was going to hear me cry tonight. I started walking downwards to the beach. At a point I removed my flip flops.

         I walked further till the sea. I could feel the waves splashing at my feet. I didn't care whether it was a high tide or a low one and somewhere I actually wished the waves would take me along. A normal person who is alone at night at the beach would feel totally at peace. But with me, the case was exactly opposite. It was difficult to decide who was more fierce, me or the sea. I had a heap of frustration stored in me but I usually like to cover it with a smile. That was the reason I acted like a drunkard, crazy. The reality was too hard to face; I am lonely. I was dying a little bit inside every time I saw his face, I so pathetically wished for him to be mine but Ha! who was I kidding? He always thought of me just as a friend, I was an insignificant part of his life but he didn't know that he basically made up my life. The time when I actually laughed; not pasted a smile on my face was when I was with him. His witty jokes and how he pulled my leg and made me laugh, made me realize how his existence really mattered a lot. But again for him, I was just a friend. Yet, there were times when he held my hand a little longer than usual or kept staring at me with his piercing hazelnut eyes, made me feel that somewhere he might have some little feelings. Shucks, no - it wasn't that way, he just knew that inside I was very lonely and he wanted me to get over it. He was just being a good friend. What could I do? I had started seeing him as more than one. I just wanted a way out.

             By now, I was all wet. Not only because of the sea, but because of my tears. I so wanted to be done. Once again, I made up the same resolution I knew I couldn't follow. Ignoring him was hard.

I looked at the black sea and the white moon one last time and somehow I was just amazed how they complemented each other so well. I put on my flip flops and started my way back home with a heavy heart and moreover a resolution, bound to break.

Break free

A poem I had written...not too old...yet different. 

Routine - 

the same old path.

Monotonous.

The streets bustling,

people walking,

zombies coming to life.

Sweat. Hard work.

The typical paycheck,

the idiot box, back home.

Stress, less sleep,

food - the enemy.

Routine - 

the same old path.

Rain clashes.

Storm coming your way.

Break free,

Fly.

Shout out loud,

yell,

let the world know

what you are worth.

Bring back the 

sparkle in your eyes.

the glow to your cheeks.

Smile, laugh

Enjoy.

Because

before you know it,

the thunder rolls,

lightning strikes,

and the world 

crumbles,

before your very own eyes.

And you're left helpless
regret is all you see.

Break the chains,
let go.
Before the time's passed
you'll know.
Not weak,
feel the power.
Open your eyes,
see it.
Feel alive.
Dance, sing.
Love and live.
Break free.
Fly,
Soar High.

Pair of favorite eyes

Another cheesy poem, seems I write a lot of cheesy ones. :P I will try not to... 

You search for

Those favorite pair of eyes

The ones that capture

Your heart and

Never fail to leave

You breathless.

You have something 

On the tip of your tongue

You want to share.

That feeling

Bubbling inside you.

You cant wait

To tell him,

Your best friend,

With that 

Sparkle in your eyes.

Beating faster,

Your heart

Finally sets its sight

On the destination.

Overcome with grief, 

You have no place

To hide.

It was then,

When you found

Those favorite pair of eyes,

Looking deep,

Into a pair 

Of another ones.

Someone you know,

You are happy for...

Yet cant help but be

Disappointed.

Poor,

Shattered heart. 

You have something

On the tip of your tongue

And you cant wait 

To tell him.

But that's how it stays.

You're not needed anymore.

Bleeding heart,

You compromise.

Compromise,

For those pair of favorite eyes,

The ones that

Capture your heart

And never fail 

To leave you breathless.

Take a step back

I wrote it day before yesterday...Sorry for making it too long. It's quite a different one and I personally like it. Hope you like it.

Once 

A misty evening,

You open your eyes,

To a thought.

A realization.

You feel 

Like a colorless clown,

running behind

a Rusty Mannequin.

Like a maniac.

Too tight, 

A griphold.

You struggle to let go

You fight yourself.

A tear

squeezes itself out.

Those trembling hands - 

Fail to find 

a light to fade

The darkness,

that you are about

to push yourself

into.

Finally,

the clock strikes 12. 

The griphold,

you let loose.

Take a step back.

Push him away,

as away as you can.

Deep breath,

you look behind.

The rusty mannequin

you Need.

The clown that 

you have become.

Drugged you feel.

Yet standing straight,

you avoid.

You are not worried.

A picture

in your head

tells you.

He will come.

Apologize.

Say sorry.

One day,

 there will be bliss.

The world shakes,

you stand,

A firm ground.

And you find-

the apple not eaten,

the strand of the ribbon

not broken,

not looked upon.

What If?

What if...

everything goes...

Backward.

The clock strikes 11.

The memories,

Etched forever,

You wait.

But

He never comes.

The sun never rises.

And it dawns 

upon you - 

He was never yours!

Hurt washes you over.

Your heart aches 

in grief.

He never needed you.

With

Blood-red eyes,

And stone-cold heart,

You Take a step back.

Solitude.